Challenge #4

The hardest part of parenting? Wow, these writing challenges sure can be a doozy.  These are things that are hard for me. What may be a struggle for me may not be a struggle for you.

The hardest part of parenting are the drastic difference between my two children. Everyone tells you that each kid is different and they naturally will have different personalities. What worked for one kid won’t for the other. They will develop at their own rate and not the same way as their siblings etc. These common sayings are exacerbated by Big M being special needs. As his Papa told me one evening, Big M has always been a different baby and now little boy.

I didn’t know how lucky(?) I was with Big M as a baby. He was content to entertain himself. He never really got into things he wasn’t supposed to and if he did it was only once or twice. Apparently this is so different from normal I now want to cry with Little M. He is just as active as Big M was but he wants to be entertained and gets into EVERYTHING. No matter how many times I tell him no, redirect, discipline him. It takes several days to get through his head that some things are off limits. Big M was just as curious as Little M but never like this. I rarely needed baby gates with Big M. I need better baby gates with Little M because he has almost figured out how to open the ones that I have.

Swan family that broke out of an exhibit. My boys don't fit in a box either.
Swan family that broke out of an exhibit. My boys don’t fit in a box either.

Parenting Big M, by itself, is a huge challenge. More times than I can count I have been in tears over it. I have had to throw up my hands and admit that I don’t know what to do and have no ideas left to try. I have had to re-evaluate how I handle things so many times and constantly adapt to keep up with him. I have devoted 6 months to a more rigorous schedule than most parents want to even think about. If I had been able to get him on a similar schedule this summer I would have done it again. Big M does not fit any one diagnosis. He does not fit Autism, Bipolar, ADHD, OCD, ODD, SED, SPD, or Insomnia. He is not considered a self-harmer or dangerous to his family and friends. All of these and probably more have been thrown out as possibilities that we need to look more into. To sum it up and put into easy terms. The hardest part about parenting is not knowing what is wrong with my son so that we know how to handle the various situations as well as the differences between him and Little M.

Polar Bears disagreeing. Big M and Little M do something very similar often.
Polar Bears disagreeing. Big M and Little M do something very similar often.

What do you find to be hard when it comes to parenting? How do you combat these challenges?



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