Falling Off the Wagon

Here I thought I was doing so well. This time last week I had several posts done up for the week and plans to get more written. I was so confident that I decided to give ya’ll a special treat and post TWO a day!! So much confidence and a smidge of insanity there, topped off with a healthy dose of wishful thinking. Risking sounding like a broken record here but this last week was hard on me. Just when things start to look better I fall off the cliff again. This is most likely due to me trying to do too much when I finally do feel better. Note to self: I am NOT super woman and I need to ease myself back into things.

See I get overwhelmed so easy. I walk into the kitchen and see the mess left for me to clean up and start crying. I don’t even know where to begin. The same happens in every single room in the house. The result? I sit down to try and relax and don’t get back up. I get distracted. The kids wake up or need something. They start fighting and I get stressed out more. Did I mention that I get overwhelmed easily? This may not sound like a lot but for me it is. For me it is a big deal and a struggle for me everyday.

This weekend I celebrated the fact that I got dressed on a day when we weren’t going out instead of staying in my pajamas.  One day I even had most everyone in the family up and dressed and waiting for HD to get home so we could leave for appointments. These should be simple right? Wrong. I should have the excuse of being a mom to a newborn right? Oh but wait. This is my third baby I should be a pro at this by now.  Not.  What’s my problem? Why can’t I be up and dressed and cooking meals and snacks while playing with the kids?

This week I also read a post by the fabulous Maniac Mom. It hit REAL close to home. See, HD wanted to give me a birthday present. He told me that I could spend money anywhere on anything I wanted (with a spending limit but still) the only rule was that it had to be on ME not a single other person in any way. I couldn’t do it. A week later and I still hadn’t spent the money and even ended up crying over it a couple times. I BEGGED him to let me just buy something for the kids. Nope, he was adamant. It was to be used on me and only me. What’s my problem? Why did it stress me out so bad to spend money on myself?

So many times did I sit down to write out posts for the blog and to spend some time networking on various hops and parties. So may times did I just click away because the thought of even going through 10 pages commenting and liking was too much. I couldn’t even write one more post. All I wanted to do was watch YouTube. Oh and play video games. I went on a video game spree this weekend. It’s not that hard to tell someone “HI!” and hit the Facebook like button. This weekend it was nearly impossible. I also haven’t been able to keep up with the instagram photo a day posts that I was trying to do. I fell off the blogging face of the earth. Again.

Everything was too much for me.  Add in newborns having trouble eating and sleeping and me having a round of insomnia and this last week has been just peachy. I have made an effort to turn things around myself instead of just waiting around to spontaneously feel better. I got up and got dressed one morning. The next day I put on makeup. I also allowed HD to buy me something slightly frivolous. Granted it was using a coupon but hey, I still chose something and didn’t put it back on the shelf! I sat down and planned out some ideas for Facebook posts and added some pictures to instagram. Now you have this post!

Sadly things have been backing up again. I have half a ton of laundry to do, several loads of dishes, more vacuuming and carpet cleaning, general pick up around the house, posts to write and not enough time to get it all done in a reasonable amount of time.

Have you ever struggled to get through normal days? What about when you add in stressful events such as a sick baby, multiple doctor appointments or extra commitments outside the family duties?

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11 Comments Add yours

  1. Norma Hess says:

    I think many of us SAHMommas experience overwhelming feelings of not “doing enough” but it doesn’t mean we are not doing enough. If my kiddos are fed, happy, and I’m still alive at the end of the day… I can call that a win 😉 — hang in there! Try not to beat yourself up over little details, I promise you won’t remember which room was clean and which wasn’t once the kids are all grown up and out of the house. 😉

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    1. homemademomy says:

      I would agree Norma! Fed, happy and alive are the most important and is definitely a win at the end of the day. Thank you for your kind words and stopping by.

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  2. Kris says:

    as a FTM and SAHM, this spoke to me. there are days where I just don’t feel motivated to do anything and then everything gets backed up. This encourages me because I am not alone. I want to pick myself up and press on. in return, I want to encourage you. The way you wrote this blog made me want to finish it because you made yourself personable and real. keep pressing on mom!

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    1. homemademomy says:

      I am glad this was helpful for you. My biggest goal was to let other Mommy’s know that they aren’t alone in their struggles. Thank you for the encouragement and for stopping by. You are doing absolutely amazing mama! Keep pushing forward and enjoy the moments with your little one because they grow up WAY too fast.

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  3. I have a two year old and two month old and I go through the same thing. Some days are a lot harder than others. I keep telling myself it will get better when they get older, but I don’t know if I am just lying to myself. haha. =-)

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    1. homemademomy says:

      I don’t know if it gets easier or if you just adjust. I found that different things were hard as they grew up so it wasn’t necessarily easier it was different. I have my good days and bad days though. The seasons, or lack their of, where I live don’t help either. I hope that made sense! Thank you for stopping by and commenting.

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  4. vetsmomrgv says:

    Focus on what you have done!! We are enough, keep at it! love from BMM

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    1. homemademomy says:

      Thank you for the comment love! We are just stepping through the days and making it work.

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  5. msdiaperd says:

    I fall off the wagon every single day. ❤

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    1. homemademomy says:

      Thank you for stopping by! Hugs back to you mama. You are amazing and I love watching your videos and talking to you in the BMM.

      Like

  6. hinoonvlog says:

    Give yourself a break ❤ When you are not sleeping, nothing counts. Ha. Take your time and take in snuggles. All else can wait. Enjoyed the read. Love from B Mommy Meetup 🙂

    Like

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